F.A.Q.

To be considered for membership: Resolve

What is a “House”?

A “House” is also known as a Tribe, Clan, Leather Family, Poly Tribe, Rope Family, Urban Tribe etc.

In short these titles denote a tight-knit group of individuals with some unifying factors. In the case of House Sanguine, the desire to explore new mental and emotional realms in a safe and pressure-free environment.

Generally speaking the “spoke” or individual this unit is joined by is Xenith of the Phoenix, AZ area. This is an “invite only” family whom reconnect in person frequently.

If you are new to this notion, here are a few great links:

Leather Family (Taino Leather Family)
Leather Family (Edgeliving)
The Poly Tribes (Modernpoly)
Urban Tribes (4teachers)

What is “Sanguine”?

Pronounced: { sang-gwin }

It has a few meanings which resonate with us. Here are a couple links that will help shed some light on our name.

Vocabulary.com
Thefreedictionary.com
Thesaurus.com
For the historians
For the geeks

What is the overall image or meaning behind the images?

House Sanguine Sigil by Xenith is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.
Based on a work at https://housesanguine.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/hslogo_color.png.

Rose/thorns: A reminder that sometimes even the most beautiful things in life have thorns. You must take the good, with the bad. Yen with the Yang. Black with the white, night with the day. We embrace our darkness, as well as our light. These thorns can be seen in many places within our sigil.

Colors: Blood Red– Represent our color (sanguine), as well as passion and lust. Gray (shades)– Represent the gradation in life, and the ability to see the complexities in most all things. It also represents a recognition of multiple fetishes/kinks, as well as multiple gender identities and lifestyle choices and the importance of recognition and equality of all of them between consenting adults that are not harming anyone unwillingly (inside or outside the fetish community).

Red flower in the center: Represents a fully bloomed rose (see explanation above), which also has 6 petals. These inner petals represent 6 Core Members to indicate a specific desired number to keep the core membership amount at for best results, as quality over quantity is desired and intimacy is lost with large number of individuals.

Copyright 1995, 1997 by Quagmyr@aol.com. Used by permission.

Spiral shape: This spiral shape is also reminiscent of and inspired by the most common BDSM Symbol, the triskelion. “The three divisions represent the various threesomes of BDSM. First of all, the three divisions of BDSM itself: B&D, D&S, and S&M. Secondly, the three-way creed of BDSM behavior: Safe, Sane, and Consensual. Thirdly, the three divisions of our community: Tops, Bottoms, and Switches.” [more]

Descending/ascending layers: Much like a spiral staircase, this can be viewed as an ascension (rise), or a descension (lowering) depending on the way you look at it. It represents personal growth and awareness by going deeper into oneself to know the core, as well as rising above oneself and reaching outward beyond ones self towards community and love/peace. It also represents the matalic colors to represent the correct version of the BDSM triskelion, as there is some creative liberties in our design.

Six petals/layers: This represents our original 5 House Sanguine Tenets, as well as one layer/petals/tenet that is yet to be decided or created. This represents that the universe is an enigma which sometimes should stay that way.

Four spheres: Even though our symbol appears to be 4 3D circles/spheres (sanguine ring, large gray petals, inner sanguine flower), it is actually comprised of 4 parts. That which is described above as the general HS community, Full Members, then Core Members of HS. Outermost rim and beyond represents the rest of the world and all living things.

Circle shape: The reason our symbol is a circle and not any other shape is to be similar to another common symbol or theme, the ring of O. “The Ring of O is a specially designed ring which has been worn as a distinctive mark among BDSM practitioners… Its use is relatively widespread within this subculture…” [more]

White candle: Some of our symbolism will represent candles and/or flickering flame with red dripping from the candle. This represents fire/heat which has the power to create or destroy which should be respected. It also represents passion or romance, with red/blood as an indicate of sometimes painful romance or play. Love is also the dichotomy of creation/destruction, pain/comfort. The candle is often white representing the melding down of or transition of “pure” or “vanilla” tendencies and the release of inhibitions.

Are you a cult?

That Depends on who you ask! I am sure most of the “civilized” and “moral” society will have a hard time wrapping their gray-matter around the entire BDSM community, yet alone one as tight-knit and symbolic and ceremonial as ourselves. However we do not have one “True” leader, as multiple people (core members) guide this house on a level playing field. Although we may appear shrouded in secrecy, there is only love and pleasure hidden behind our curtains. Or is that all?

Why create this house?

The inspiration for House Sanguine came from multiple cities, individuals, and experiences the founder (Xenith) became acquainted to over the years. This is a manifestation of all the good, and as little of the bad as can be presented from the communities, poly tribes, leather houses, packs, and organizations the founder took part in. It is intended to be a classy and sexy “safe space” for those we hold near and dear.

What do you all do?

A lot. That sums it up. As a hint, it feels good and yes they do ask for it!

In all seriousness we spend time together in a variety of ways. Primarily through person-to-person interaction. No matter if it is at an outing, during one of our own “munches/coffees”, at a “play party” we organized, or a family meeting for support and communication.

What are Play Parties?

Most of us enjoy B&D, D/s, and S&M activities when we get the right opportunity. Play parties are just such opportunities! Our parties (and most all our gatherings) are by invite-only to lend to the intimate and unique experience that not everyone will have the privilege of enjoying. All our members (and party attendants) are pre-screened and well-known amongst our other members for safety and maximum compatibility. Any touch whatsoever is by consent only. “Scenes” are fully negotiated, limitations/abilities/interests are honored, and all peoples and relationship are respected.

Do I have to get naked or have sex if I come to an event?

Not if you don’t want to! That is your choice, and your choice will always be respected. Our members are pre-screened for a reason! However if you do we ask that you do so in a way that does not harm or damage any person or property and/or clean up your mess! Anything related to nudity is done so with an attempt at respecting (most all) decency laws, and privacy is valued and respected. Furthermore if you are uncomfortable with or frightened by anything you may witness we ask that you “own your own emotions” and respect the scene by removing yourself from the immediate vicinity instead of stopping or objecting to the other’s scene or activity. This is for everyone mutual safety and enjoyment.

So are all of you sleeping with each-other?

No. Contrary to popular belief, both BDSM and Polyamory is NOT all about sex! This is not to say that some or many of our members are not sleeping with and/or sexual with other members. We are an intimate group of individuals, but we are not a sex club per-say. Honest, ethical, consensual, non-monogamy of many diverse assortments may be witnessed and experienced within House Sanguine however.

Do you have to be poly to join?

No. However most of our members are poly (sexual or amorous).

Do you have to be a heavy top (hard hitter/Sadist) to join?

No. However a few of our members are.

Do you have to be a switch, into petplay or anything else to join?

No, No, No. However most of our members are. We value and respect diversity in all of it’s many forms.

What about S.S.C., R.A.C.K. or P.R.I.C.K.?

All of our members practice the general BDSM standard of “Safe, Sane & Consensual” with all activities between consenting adults. However some of our Members practice “Risk Aware Consensual Kink”. This could include “edge-play” activities between consenting adults. This may include blood, urine, or similar play as well as behavior modification, permanent or semi-permanent markings and the like.

Sounds scary and a little exciting huh!?

However no one is forced against their will, and all members are free to end a scene and/or remove themselves from the immediate vicinity at any time. P.R.I.C.K. emphasizes Persona Responsibility and Informed Consent as well. Our members are also knowledgeable in their crafts and take all due considerations to safety at all times. Otherwise they are removed from membership/attendance to future events.

Does membership cost anything?

No. General membership just costs a couple minutes of your time. Resolves are an added filter for safety, and a declaration of you not being completely clueless. If selected, you will be added to the email-list where party and event invites are sent. Joining this contact/general member list is free, and attendance to events is optional. We do not sell our list or violate anyone’s privacy, and there is no obligation at this level whatsoever. Keep in mind that not all people that request to be a member of House Sanguine are selected as part of our general or any other membership level. You may get an approval email followed by event invites, or you may not.

Do gatherings cost anything?

Some do, but it really depends on the events or activities. We are good at what we do, but at present we are unable to predict the future.

Do Play Parties cost anything?

Generally speaking yes, but not for all members.

• Core Members are commonly not required to pay federal currency to attend/participate in play parties, but they are expected to contribute in some way to the House and our events.
• Full Members will commonly have a small cost attached to their [and their partner(s)] attendance and participation.
• General Members pay slightly more then Full members. This gives a large network a chance to try our events and family out before committing more of their time and energy.

All funds collected from our events are recycled back into our organization.

What are expectations or responsibilities as a member?

Full members are expected to contribute to the web that is House Sanguine, which includes aiding in planning and implementation of events, care for our members, and help with sustaining the House. Full Members are expected to have exhibited that they are decent, trust-worthy, and generally safe and drama-free individuals. General Members have to be willing to learn something new, and have fun in the process.

What about “Trigger Warnings” in conversation and text?

First and foremost, the House emphasizes the quality of personal responsibility in all matters. Stated simply, the House position on trigger warnings is that no member will be required to provide a “trigger warning” before opening a discussion or posting a photo that may be of a sensitive/controversial/traumatic nature. If a House member has a particular sensitivity to a certain topic, it is their responsibility to manage their own emotions in regards to said topic, as well as their responsibility to make said sensitivities known to the other members of the House. Regardless of whether or not certain members have sensitivities, no member of the House will be required to self-censor a discussion to cater to said sensitivities. That being said, if a member of the House broaches a topic with the knowledge that another member will be negatively affected by said topic, with either willful malicious intent or negligent disregard, that member will be considered in violation of the House Tenets, and subject to review by Core Members and possible consequences. When discussing topics of a possibly sensitive nature, House members are expected to utilize their best judgment as well as a responsibility and awareness for how their actions impact other members of the House.

Is House Sanguine a business or non-profit?

No, not presently. However in the future we may organize as a formal Interdependant Alliance, Cooperative, or Not-for-Profit.

Is there a dress code?

No, not really. However for play-parties we tend to encourage our Members to dress formal and semi-formal. At least to the door. From there cloths may come off according to comfort levels. All are free to be an individual. Our Core Members may wear our formal House Sanguine garb (unique hand-crafted local designs), of which shall remain a mystery to most.

Are there any special ceremonies or rites?

Maybe… You will just have to find out…

Is there a membership “cap” or limit?

Yes, generally speaking. For Play Parties most of the time we have limited space, and our goal is not popularity. We prefer intimate quality over quantity arrangements. Also House Sanguine will be comprised of 6 Core Members with those closest to them making up the rest of the Full and General membership base. However in time our House may branch out into other cities.

Who can join?

Any consenting adult (over 18 legal years of age) that is approved for membership and personally invited to each event. This is usually community members in Phoenix, AZ. but some acceptations are made. Resolves are mandatory for all General, Full, and Core members (those invited to events).

Are there age-range or other restrictions?

Actually, in this case yes. We ideally like all our Full Members and a majority of our General Members to be consenting legal adults (18+), and youthful/attractive. In particular healthy in mind, soul, and body with high Emotional Intelligence. Also confidence and inner strength are desirable to us. Youth is not restricted to a specific age-range, rather a mind and body-state. We want all or at least a majority of our members to be compatible with one another.

What about STDs/STIs?

At present we do not have any, and would like to keep it this way. Sharing is caring in most all cases, but this isn’t one of them.

NOTICE: We DO NOT restrict individuals based on their health status related to STI’s, however we may restrict individuals that practice poor sexual hygiene and/or poor communication, poor trustworthiness, or poor respect for the comfort levels of others. We expect all our members to disclose such information when it is appropriate for the health and well-being of all. 

Is this the only House/Tribe/Family members can be in?

Not necessarily, however we do ask all our members (and especially our Core Members) juggle all their priorities effectively and responsibly. If there appears to be a conflict of interest, it may become a topic of discussion. As this is a part of one of our Tenents, some individuals inadvertently harming our House may be asked to prioritize in whatever way serves the whole best.

How do people join?

Simply put; Resolve. Then cross your fingers.

Why take Resolve?

The gravity of this question is so large, we have included a separate page covering this question.

How long does Membership last?

That is up to your individual choice, as well as your conduct. Membership is a privilege, not a right. Some members may be removed from their status or the invite list (with or without warning) if they bring more problematic circumstances to the House then complimentary ones.

What if a problem comes up?

We require responsible self-ownership no matter your identity, relationship dynamic, or preferences. Respectfully speak to whomever may be aiding discomfort, and have it resolved. If this is not possible or effective consider asking to discuss it with the House at one of our House Gatherings (emotional support & event planning meetings). Express your need for such a discussion to our Core Members.

What if I want out for some reason?

Even slaves are free to follow their passions and what guides them, and move to where they feel most safe. We do request that you practice clear communication and at least help us understand such decisions so we may better serve the community.

We encourage free will, and participation is a choice.